Thursday, February 27, 2003

Recently, my roomates and I have been noticing the horrible horrible use, or actually misuse, of the English language by people on TV.

Now I can't claim to have the best grammar, and my writing tends to go on and on and on in the worst possible way, as if run on sentences were really just one sentence paragraphs with a lot of commas. (Actually possible to do in Spanish. I can't. But I've seen it.)

However, the examples I am about to share with you may cause you to question the validity of the American school system as we know it:

On Joe Millionaire (I watched, so what?), when one of the women was asked what she would do with Joe's money, she said
"Blah Blah feed hungry children in Africa (obviously chick talk for "buy a lot of Prada")." And the direct quote: "I guess I'm just a mercenary like that."

Everyone, please take a moment to remember that MERCENARIES kill for a living, they dont FEED children or help people. Unless the kind of help you need is killing someone.

And then, there have been a plethora of nouns or adjectives turned into some variation of xxxx-tion. Like, taking the word "mouth" and saying, "I think the world would be a better place if we can have some mouthtion."

Yes, it makes no sense. Its obvious and you think to yourself, surely Center is jesting? This was not on TV, this was not allowed to be said and go without reprimand. Or at least a hardy laugh and eye twinkle at some famous person's expense. Come on America, its out favorite past time! Build em up and tear em down! But oh no, everyone at Entertainment Tonight and Access Hollywood just kept rolling with the grammatical punches.

And finally, Fred Durst, speaking at the MTV movie/ video/ music/ pop culture/ sex/ death of rock n roll Awards, in a heartfelt protest against war, saying that we are all in "agreeance" as Americans that this war should not happen.

You can't even spell "agreeance" without knowing it is a horrible mistake.

The people at MTV news said nothing, except "Fred Durst, in a more serious moment, let his feelings about world peace be known when he made this statement..."

"I am just a simple mercenary trying to find some aggreance on the stopation of the war with Sodom Whosein."