Dear Mystery Co-worker,
Remember when you sent me that anonymous email a couple of months ago that said how you worked with me and that I wasn't nearly as smart as I thought I was if someone who worked with me read my blog and knew all about the insulting things I said about my job?
Remember how I actually work on a team of exactly 5 people, one of whom is computer illiterate, one of whom doesn't care, leaving me and two others o I could have totally narrowed it down and confronted your chicken ass directly, but didn't?
I'm really upset and need to talk to someone "in the know" about this job. I miss our old boss Bob. He was so cool.. He left us alone and trusted us to do our jobs like real grown ups. He let us leave early if we were sick, or if someone's kid (or cat) was in trouble. He didn't sweat it if you came in late, or forgot to mark your appointments in the calendar. He listened to all of us complain about each other and never made anyone feel dumb, although, personally, you are kinda dumb.
How do you like this new boss? Is it just me or do you get the impression that she is working for a Great Evil? Like, even evil-er then you when you write me checks for the phone bills for the the wrong amount. Why does she want to know who has done what, and when, and why ALL THE TIME? When I got hired for this job, I was under the impression that we were a help and support group, here to provide HELP and SUPPORT to the people who need it. Yet, she keeps asking why it is that so-and-so needs help, like she's gonna report them to the principal. I think she might be a spy for central administration, and she's looking to bring down the entire union. Watch your back, my dear mystery friend.
And she can't read spreadsheets. HOW did she get into accounting without being able to read an EXCEL spreadsheet?! And why do I have to keep re-doing the fucking spreadsheet because she is a dipshit know-it-all with a large stick up her ass?
I feel like you and I are France and England during WWII, tried and true enemies, but linked to a common cause of fighting evil Nazi asswipes. She's the Asswipe, your stupid old France, and I'm the good gawddamn UK.