Wednesday, September 28, 2005

if I worship the tv, is that a sin?

This tv season has me watching at least one show every night. Oh sweet afternoon classes, thank you for not interrupting my "special time" with my mom's big ass tv.

Here is what I am watching:

Prison Break, Fox. Oh man. Not only is this dude hot, covered in tattoos, and super-intense, but he's willing to loose toes for his brother, Soon-to-Be-Executed-Man. See, STBEM was convicted- wrongly, natch- for killing the Vice President's pro-environment anti-oil lobbying brother (sniff sniff, is that a conspiracy I smell?) and gets sent to a prison that JUST SO HAPPENS to be designed by STBEM's brother, Mr Hottie-Tattoo-Man. So Mr HTM gets some pen and paper and cooks up an awesome escape route with all kinds of chemicals and secret code names and shizz, gets the plans for the prison tattooed on his whole upper body (cleverly disguised, of course), then robs a bank-- wherein he makes sure to fire his gat because that makes it a federal crime (state prison is so passe), gets convicted and shipped off to the same prison as his brother who's got a date with the electric chair IN LESS THAN 4 WEEKS!!! Gasp. So then Mr HTM has got to get some other prisoners (who have their own back stories, kinda boring since Mr HTM isn't in them) to join him in the prison break, one of whom CUTS OFF MR HTM'S TOES trying to get information out of him that Mr HTM just won't give. Then Mr HTM cries about it to the very cute prison doctor lady and we see he is really intense AND emotionally available. Best. Show. Ever.

Gilmore Girls, The WB- I watched this before but I never made a point of watching it EVERY week. That Rory is just fucking up left and right.

Supernatural, also The WB- The first two episodes of this weren't so bad-- a couple of cheap scares, a laugh or two. Sure, its not Buffy, I mean, it ain't even Angel, but its one of the only horror-type shows on tv that isn't a total rip-off of Lost or Medium. Um, plus there are hotties. However, last night's episode saw some heavy channel surfing on my part. It got boring, I got to flipping. Yay short attention span!

*at this point I would like to let you, my dear readers, know that since I am sending this via email, I have to hand fucking code all these damn links and fuck it, you google this shit*

**Ok, second addendum: linking via email-blog doesn't work, so I just had to go back and remove all the code I did by hand and replace it with blogger-approved code. So now I really really don't feel like making links for everything.**

Barbershop, Showtime- This is the tv version of the movie and its nasty, raunchy, and pretty damn funny. I watch the reruns on Showtime only when I have access to my dad's satellite tv.

Obviously, Lost, ABC- I got really ticked at the way Lost totally slowed down about half way through last season. However, this season's opener? I about pissed my pants when that dude listening to the creepy 70s music was IN THE HATCH!! IN THE FUCKING HATCH PEOPLE! And then Walt?! With the whispering?! I went on the internet and found out what the fuck he was saying (its backwards for "don't press" and "the bad button"). Crap, I'm so excited for this Wednesday's episode. If Kate gets killed off before her and Jack make with the smooching-- ARGH, I get angry just thinking about it.

Weeds, Showtime- Again, reruns, and entirely dependant on dad's tv viewing schedule. In this show, a suburban widow decides to sell weed to her totally white, totally yuppie planned community after her hubbs dies and leaves her with two kids and one wacky brother-in-law. Just this last episode she had to fend off a rival dealer that was leaving pennies on her doorstep.

Smallville, the WB. Remember when Smallville started and everyone and their mother was all excited because it was SuperMan in High School and that was supposed to be cool and original? Well, it wasn't. I watched the first season and my reaction was somewhere around BOOORRRING, with a little LAAAAME on the side. And then I rolled my eyes and changed it back to Dawson's Creek. Now that Clark is out of highschool, things are getting hot hot hot. I'm pretty sure that more aliens will be landing. Hopefully, they will all looking like Tom Welling.

Degrassi Junior High and Degrassi High, The N. Oh yes people, The N is bringing back the old school Degrassi.

HELLO, Degrassi The Next Gen and Instant Star!! Although both of them just finished their half-seasons, so I have to wait for January. I both love and hate The N for introducing me to Canadian teen programming.

My itty bitty social life gets some attention here. When MKD and AP are free, of course.

Rome, HBO- Hello, sex and blood and ancient Roman Empire cussing.