Thursday, January 12, 2006

i gave my heart to rock and roll

So this is it kiddies. 

The Last Semester. 

Much like The Last Supper, I am surrounded by blowhards and sneak-theives who would sell me out in an effin minute.  Except we're in a library science class, not ancient biblical times.  And sadily, no one is drinking any wine.

I did eat a rice cake made from some grain used in ancient Egypt, however.  Its not quite the flesh of christ, but I think it rounds out the scene.

Library Science can be surprisingly cutthroat.  You know, like the time that kid sold me for thirty silver pieces and the dean was all, Are You the King of the Jews?! and I was like, uh no, I'm the Center of the Universe, BEEAATCH!  Represent!

Sorry.  I watched Jesus Christ Superstar the other day. 

But the part about the Last Semester is true.  I am officially in my last two classes.  Here is the mathematical formula for that:

Two classes + Comprehensive Exams = Master's of Library Science, May 2006. 

Its quite possible that I will NEVER be in school again!  Which is actually terribly improbable, as I am a nerdy nerd and will more than likely end up getting another Master's in History or a LS PhD.

Of course, that would mean sitting through another 3+ years of library science class and honestly, I don't know if I could do that without severe repercussions to the global economy, the democratic system, and the free world. 

Actually, if you will allow me to quote myself:

"..last night in class we spent an hour answering the question, "What is information?' And then someone said, ' Well, what isn't information?' and I screamed and pulled my face off, stomped on it and then kicked it at the person."
--email to MKD and AP, 11 January 2006

That is only what happened in the first class.  In the second, the prof asked the same question and now she is dead.  I ate her and then pooped her out into a paper bag, set the bag on fire, put it in front of the door, rang the doorbell for her husband and ran away.  Ha ha.  Poop.

Now I have to go read a hundred pages on libraries and information in society.  Lock up your children and pets, its going to be a rough night.