Thursday, August 31, 2006

bah, humbug

The kids are back on campus and I hate them.

Maybe hate is too strong a word.  Maybe I should say: dislike.  Or, disdain.  Yes, that's it, I disdain them.

Summer on a university campus is so wonderful.  Few people are around, there are never any lines or crowds anywhere, and we close early on Fridays.  Things are a little slower, people are a little nicer, and no one is constantly opening the door to see my scowling face and instantly realizing--OMG! Just like the sign out front says!-- this isn't classroom 102 but suite 101, University Archives.  102 is down the corridor and to the left.  Dumbass.

There is something about these 18 to 22 year olds that just plain irks me.  I don't even like looking at them.  Of course, this being a smallish catholic university, most of these kids are privileged and white, with pocketfuls o' dad's money.  Their collars are popped, their flip flops are Abercrombie, and if I see one more straight white dude in a pink polo or pastel Bermuda shorts, I might have to slap a bitch. 

Some clothes are just meant for gay men.  Metrosexual is so 2002.

These kids open their mouths and in the most uncaring, self-concerned, oblivious to the plight of starving orphans and the dangers of global warming tones, describe their first classes as "ugh, boring" and discuss the next time to "get like, totally fucked up."  I was standing in the bathroom, in my business casual work clothes from H&M, my ID lanyard around my neck, glasses on cuz I haven't gotten around to re-ordering and paying for new contacts, cuz my credit cards are now both absurdly high, and I just wanted to kick them.

I'm so above them and their small little homework-stressed dorm-sharing cafeteria-eating lives.  I mean, gawd.  I'm twenty-fucking-six.  I totally think about starving orphans at least once in a while and I replaced all my high wattage bulbs with the extra long life twisty florescent ones.  And having a master's degree while still working at a technician level for dick money doesn't bother me at all.  And I don't miss shopping at Sephora. 

Not at all.